The Big News: Shhhhh. HHH and Orton are wrestling.

Show Analysis:

Chris Jericho came out to start the show. Yes, he was drafted to Smackdown last week. The announcers half-heartedly tried to explain this, with Michael Cole at one point saying, “Remember the draft takes full effect next week after Backlash.”

There was no explanation for why this was the case. So, Raw wrestlers going to Smackdown still participated here. So too did Smackdown wrestlers drafted to Raw. And for that matter, so too did Smackdown wrestlers who weren’t on Raw before and haven’t been drafted to Raw for the future. Don’t worry about it. WWE will get to enforcing this whole split brand concept eventually.

Jericho was happy that this would be his “last and final appearance on Raw forever.” I would say the odds of Jericho never wrestling again on Raw are about the same as Big Boss Man wrestling again on Raw. Jericho said that without him Raw will change for the worse and fans will be begging him to come back.

Ricky Steamboat came out and thanked Jericho for giving him the passion to perform again. Jericho said Steamboat was trying to get in the spotlight again, and that he needs to put Steamboat out of his misery. Jericho called for a singles match at Backlash on Sunday. I don’t know about doing that with a one week build. They probably should have thought about the Backlash lineup in previous weeks. Don’t you think that sounds like a good idea?

John Cena came out, but Jericho said he didn’t care what Cena had to say. He said his last act on Raw would be to walk out. As he did, Steamboat accepted the match for Backlash. Then Cena said that Vickie Guerrero wasn’t there but that she made Jericho vs. Cena for later in the show.

Batista beat Chavo Guerrero. Chavo said that he would prove that not only can he push around Vickie’s wheelchair, but he can also push around anyone on the Raw roster. That brought out Batista who immediately hit the Batista bomb for the pin. As Batista was leaving, Chavo grabbed the microphone, apologized to Vickie, and said he wasn’t ready. Batista came back to the ring. A fearful Chavo said that he was ready, but got another Batista bomb anyway. This was a funny segment.

CM Punk beat Kane in a complete waste of time. Kane went for a choke slam but Punk got out with some horribly botched thing and pinned Kane. This was another perfect example of a match that accomplishes nothing other than burying the significance of matches in general. Moreover, they only had one move to do, and they couldn’t have screwed that up any more horribly.

Santino called out Santina to apologize to her for getting her into the Great Khali kiss situation. Santino said that the people who think they are the same person are crazy. Santina appeared on the screen and said she had a blister on her lip that would prevent her from kissing Khali on Smackdown. The video started fast forwarding, and a nervous Santino tried to explain that Santina had too much Red Bull (as opposed to this being a pre-recorded video).

Santino began reading a poem for no reason, other than apparently the writers think poetry is a great addition to a pro wrestling show. Or maybe they were big fans of Lanny Poffo. Who knows? I will say this much. He was the world’s smartest man and Beefcake was double dumb. Beth Phoenix came out and said she was sorry to hear about the blister, but that she talked to Vickie and they set aside time for a Santina/Khali kiss at Backlash instead.

Melina beat Beth Phoenix to retain the women’s title. Michael Cole explained during this match that Raw could end up with the world and WWE titles, as well as the women’s and divas titles. What exactly is the take home point from that observation other than that there are way too many duplicate titles and they mean absolutely nothing? Why would you possibly bring attention to the fact that you have created both a “divas championship” and a “women’s championship”? Anyway, Melina won with a springboard elbow, bulldog off the top and the last call after Beth accidentally ran into Rosa Mendes. This was sloppy.

John Cena beat Chris Jericho via DQ. They traded punches early, with the crowd mostly behind Jericho. Cena hit the Cena slam and five knuckle but Jericho escaped the FU and hit a DDT. Jericho sent Cena into the steps and hit an electric chair. Jericho then reversed an FU attempt into the code breaker for two. Cena then hit the FU for two.

Jericho caught Cena in the Walls. Cena escaped but Jericho hit an enzuigiri. Cena went for a superplex but Edge pushed him off for the DQ. This was overall a pretty good match, but they botched a lot of spots and it was decidedly on the lower end of their previous matches. Edge hit a one man concerto on Cena after the match, and counted to 10 for the last man standing gimmick.

Big Show beat Rey Mysterio. Show threw Mysterio around. Rey came back with a bunch of flying moves until Show kind of caught him when he went for the 619 and then delivered the knockout punch for the pin.

Randy Orton beat HHH in a no DQ match. HHH sent Orton into the announce table, and Orton returned the favor. Orton hit HHH with a garbage can and with the steps. Orton went for a DDT on the steps but HHH escaped. Orton hit HHH with a chair and gave him a DDT on the chair. HHH hit Orton in the leg with a chair and worked over the leg.

Legacy eventually ran in. Shane and Batista tried to make the save, but of course the idiots bungled things up again. Batista accidentally speared Shane and HHH was distracted by all this and hit with an RKO for the pin. The match itself was good, but the crowd was once again shockingly silent for HHH and Orton. If HHH weren’t involved, I’m sure WWE would take this as a serious warning sign that something is very wrong. They’ve done a series of extremely heavy angles and presented this as the company’s top feud, and very hot crowds don’t seem remotely interested in it for whatever reason.

Final Thoughts:

This was another bad show. The wrestling was sub-par pretty much across the board, Sunday’s Backlash feels completely superfluous, and there was a staggering lack of attention to detail.

Todd Martin
ToddMartin4L@aol.com
toddwmartin.blogspot.com